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The Chat I Never Had...


Chatting with someone is a part of human nature; if you scientifically describe, it is a medium for communication but everything is entertainment.

Ahem Ahem! I am one of those social nuisances that hate talking to people but loves chatting with them. Even If I am sneezing I have an emoticon for it. Aah! You know expressing online is so much fun than expressing offline; you can always escape the moments of embarrassments like burping, farting, picking nose and what not.

Well I have chatted with a lot of people strangers, friends, friends of friends, enemies of friends but I still have my dream chat buddies. Though I have a huge list but I generally avoid too much of writing; you see I don’t want to scare people with a 5 page blog. Now that WeChat has given me an opportunity, so I will let my thoughts wander in all possible dimensions, time, space and complexities and bring them together in the WeChat group. Let's do this :)

Well! I so much wish that WeChat gives the option, “Connect with extinct people”. I will surely ping Mr. Einstein and will continue pinging him until he is completely irritated by my “sad smileys” or is impressed by my devotion towards him. Firstly I am going to tell him to go and see his Wikipedia picture, man that is awesome , unlike his usual picture with center fresh hair and an exceptionally long tongue!

I would really want to ask him how does it feel to be synonymous of genius? What made him coin such difficult words as “critical opalescence”, “Entwurf theory”? Who tested his IQ level? Did he also give some weird IQ level test? What was his level of preparation? How did he think in different direction? I would be more than blessed if he can teach me to think out of the box! Because whatever I think has already been thought by somebody else and that too ages ago! I wish I could talk to Albert Einstein!

Now! Now! Comes my superhero turn. From the dropdowns, Ill select “Superman”. Yeah! He is one funny guy! You all know why, with that hilarious underwear fashion! Well I want to tell him however hard he tried to market his USP nobody dared to follow it. I mean, it seriously takes courage flying high and showing off your red underwear. I would also love to learn some flying tricks from him, the air fares are making me go crazy, staying in the lower half of India and belonging to the northern part, I have to spend a huge amount of my salary to see my parents yearly! Man! They miss me! And I miss my girlfriend. If WeChat had this option “Transfer Powers” I would surely be flying high (I mean literally, don’t let your thoughts wander in any other direction ;))

Thirdly, I wish I could talk to Sleep! It is someone who always stays with me and if it is not there its best friend “yawn” comes across. I want to ask it, the sleep, why it is so much inclined towards lectures and seminars or speeches? And why does it send “yawn” to make it more embarrassing? I have to tell it how countless number of times I have been told to go out and wash off the face only because of “yawn” friend of its. Another question I’ll shoot is why it is so addictive? The more I sleep the more I want to sleep! Once I slept for so long that I actually missed a day of my life! God! What wonders I might have created in that day or I might have actually chatted with Einstein to be another!

You have no idea I so much want a “Mystery” dropdown in WeChat. I will surely ping one of the Aliens and ask him to transfer a picture of his! I become so confused with all weird ideas I have in my mind when comes to picturing an alien! Two Eyes! Or No Eyes! They fly, walk or glide? Do they actually have antennas clinging to their head? Is Einstein too really famous there? Do they actually have funnily looking Saucepans to travel across galaxies? Do they also fall for every other girl they see? Have they ever visited Earth? Aah! I have so many questions, but if they have not visited our Earth I would cordially invite them and be their Hrithik Roshan!

There is one person who I see every morning and every evening, whenever he is with me I stay quiet, disciplined, sincere and when he is not around I am flamboyant, notorious and dirty! The person I am talking about is my dad! Talking to him face to face is my biggest nightmare. I’ll add him to WeChat, I have a couple of things to tell him! Number One, Girlfriend, Number Two Girlfriend, Number Three Girlfriend! Well there is more to tell him other than my girlfriend! I want to confess how many times I have lied to him regarding marks! The antique Gramophone of his! I was the one who broke it! I want to tell him a how many times I have slipped away from home for night outs! I have to tell him all the smoking and drinking habits of mine and also my story of quitting them all.

There are a number of other people things I want to chat one being Lord Krishna, I want to learn all the tactics of his! Man he was awesome! How every other girl could like him? Aah! Anyways I am short of space but not of imagination!


Let's Put Everyone in a Group Chat !

Now comes my favorite part , I have quite enough interacted with them , it has now my obligation to make them friends with each other. But I have some questions to clarify before moving further, I have read that Mr. Einstein and sleep are already friends, he used to sleep 10-8 hours a day while my teachers have always told me sleeping is wastage of time. Only if Mr. Einstein and my dear Sleep clear this doubt, as a proof, I can show the chat history to my teacher and tell her to teach us accurate things! And as you all know my dad is also in the group chat he will never ever stop me from sleeping if he sees even a bit of Einstein in me.



Secondly, Did Mr. Einstein ever invented an alien theory which has still now a secret with the government? Does he know the alien added in the chat? Does alien know Mr. Einstein? Has he contributed to something to their planet also? Okay! If not Mr. Einstein the alien must surely know the Superman or he might have seen him circling his planet. So this Group chat could be best for the alien, because now he knows the blue/red colored thing that might be seen occasionally in their sky!

So guys! Chat, Chat and Chat till your last breath, okay! I exaggerated a bit but who knows at the end of the day you get enlightened by the person you admire. With this I would like to end saying we are blessed with a very powerful tool, online chat, if only we could take best use of it we will bring out best among us.

What will you do, if WeChat gave you the power to chat with any 5 entities ? Well may be, some day ! Till then you can connect with your friends, anytime, anyday !

Mark a trip to WeChat's Youtube channel for more fun!